SOTM-A046 – Fish Mints

FishMints
In attendance this week Dr. Captain Clark, Miss Marilyn J, P.W. Fenton, Bill Schmotz, Steve Ericson, and special guest Janet Sciales the StarGoddess. We begin with a strange story about girl scouts attacked by a 5 foot shark in front of Publix. Then we move on to more normal things like taking a dump while on a pogo stick… Which leadsway into “Who’s Fooling’ Who?” and the “Routledge International Handbook of Ignorance Studies”.

Finally the famous game show “Answer No Um” discussed helicopters, nipples, 3D glasses, and the skin color of turkeys on Thanksgiving. But the game was clearly won by Bill Schmotz doing such an excellent “Trump Answer” he made us all forget what his question was.

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SOTM-A045 – Wheel Of Questions

wheel.jpg“Don’t worry… the show gets better.” We receive pictures of our “naked ghost listeners”. We spin the wheel of questions and land on Head Transplants… Butt Plucks… Shrink wrapped children… paying for our date’s baby sitter… and finally we solve more of the world’s problems in a “Dear Spike On The Mic” segment. Please support us by scrolling down or clicking here to go vote for us in the Creative Loafing Best of the Bay competition.

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Award NOMINATED Show – Please Vote!

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Nominated by
CREATIVE LOAFING
as…

Best Local Radio Personality

Best Local Internet Radio Show

Best Local Podcast

Vote Now – Vote Often

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SOTM-A044 – Missed Connections

The location of all 5 points

The location of all 5 points

BREAKING NEWS: This is now the #1 rated show in the 7-8PM time period that originates from a bowling alley on N. Armenia Ave.

On tonight’s show nobody won the 1979 Lime Green AMC Pacer, so it will still be available next week. On tonight’s all male revue, we discuss “missed connections”, “priceless art”, and “graffiti insurance”. P-Dub reveals he has a “sex queen tattoo”. Spike thinks Batman “should be paid for all the bad guys he killed and put in jail”. Finally, we learn that teachers of all races slapped Steve until they were buried beneath the 5 points building. If any show deserves an award, we submit this one for consideration.

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SOTM-A043 – Can I Talk Now?

bank-of-nyergesThe show begins with a segment that ends with P-Dub’s startling admission that he is a complete idiot. We move on to a story about the formation of a racist bank after a couple fights the evil empire. From there we attack a story Spike likes to call “Read All About It” despite it having nothing to do with reading and a lot to do with panhandling. Steve wants to return the streets to the hookers. Miss Marilyn wants to see firemen wearing only boots. Clark wants to differentruate between sellers and beggars. Bill Schmotz is worried about his insurance premiums. And finally, P-Dub comes out in favor of “Street Ribs”. It goes downhill from there to the crew being taught what to argue about, and somebody winning the birthday challenge.

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SOTM-A042 – Moinomorphis

marijuana-deliveryThe lovely and talented crew is augmented by the lovely and talented Miss Monica, who returns after a long absence to demonstrate her sticktoitivness. We weigh in on Implantable Contact Lenses. We learn that cavemen didn’t need reading glasses. Spike tries to convince us that “I.C.L.s”, as he likes to call them, can “moinomorphis” as your eyesight changes so you won’t need new ones. We learn that “Speed & Feed” is the name for the new meaning of weed & feed. You’re right. But it gets worse. We have a new game show called “Answer No Um”. I’m sorry, you probably think that I said, “Answer No Um”. I did. Here’s what that means. You must answer a question, without saying “Um”, and you have 30 seconds to answer. Did you think that means your answer has to always be 30 seconds long? Neither did the panel. And of course, Bill Schmotz proves once again that he is the show’s authority when it comes to Black History.

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SOTM-A041 – Medieval Bowling

Spike-UrkelApproximately 55 seconds before this episode began, Spike left our paluscious studios to go to the baffroom. Subsequently he was on something other than “the mic” when the show started. It was perhaps after that when the staff realized how much he looks like Urkel. Once the show gets started we discover how much worse than Y2K same sex marriage is for government computers. Through this we learn that our show is #1 with Isis! Spike makes a dizecutive decision and tells us we can now order a cappungchain from Starbucks online. Unlike the entire cast, he seems to think that’s a bad thing. He then tells us about The Crayola Institute in Stockholm doing a study that suggests traffic noise makes you fat. As if that wasn’t frightening enough we learn that the cure is to wear a choker with a piece-o-low-centric sensor that scolds you on your smart phone for eating. Somehow the conclusion finds us in a medieval bowling alley mocking scientific inventions as they pass by. This could be our most important show ever.

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SOTM-A040 – Citizen Eggs

citizen-egg-boiler-originalThis award deserving episode features the normal lovely and talented crew plus the lovely and talented but not so regular Tatia. We do lots of educational things like finding out humans don’t eat eggs when they are trying to pass a United States citizenship test (or any other time according to Spike). We learn how to profit from the selling of things that are free. We learn how to sell more drugs by offering our frequent customers a discount on their dope. We also learn that a domestic situation doesn’t have to get very complicated before P-Dub can’t follow it at all. This particular show was chosen to be included in a NASA probe designed to keep space aliens away from Earth.

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SOTM-A039 – She’s On The Money

MarilynMoneyTonight our guest-host is the lovely and talented Miss Marilyn J, and she reigns over the usual lovely and talented cast of characters – Dr. Captain Clark, Steve, P.W., Bill Schmotz, and Spike (not on the mic so much). We have plenty of telephone callers, and even our studio audience gets in on the action. We give advice to fathers, mix sex with baseball, envision smell-o-vision field trips, and we talk about ten dollar chicks. It’s just like every other Spike On The Mic Show, except this one is in English.

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SOTM-A038 – Hipster Cabbage

Benefits-of-KaleAnother fine show recorded for all time. Let’s just say tonight’s cast was each lovely and talented in their own way. Some ways stranger than others. Miss Marilyn J, Mr. Jeff Rey, Mr. Pearl’s Son, Mr. Bill Schmotz, Mr. P.W., and Spike are all in attendance for this show highlighting our competitive ignorance. Listen and learn as we shout out our names, get recognized, and reveal our wrong answers. We even get to hear the long absent “Voice of Reason” as he calls in from Bali, land of the unpleasant tourists. Steve is being forcefully deported and should be back with us for the next show. If we are nice he’ll show us his slides from the trip.

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