SOTM-210 – Black History Mumf

Harriet "Spike" TubmanSpike starts this show by explaining that it’s going to be “somber” and then sets out to prove it. Luckily Billie calls in from her car and although the conversation takes some strange turns it does break us out of our “somber” mood. Spike attempts to “learn us” and therefore make us better people, but we prove to him that’s an unrealistic goal, doomed to failure. We move on to the topic of cats invading the “Westmistress” Dog Show, followed by Spain University curing the fear of deaf by making people watch video games. But thankfully all our brains are then infested with roaches. No really. Spike thinks that one day we’ll be an award WINNING show, but this episode will have nothing to do with that.

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SOTM-209 – Golden Shower Show

Our X-Steamed Guest, Jeff Klein

Beside the “normal” lovely and talented panelists, we feature the lovely and talented comedian Jeff Klein. Of course our first topic is therefore “Would you marry your grandfather for millions?” Spike asks us to provide our unopinionated opinions, and we do. We eventually conclude that the granddaughter will receive half as a divorce settlement, and the other half as an inheritance. We attempt to begin a new topic about “Entrepreneurial Stuart”, but we are interrupted by a collect call from the Sham Shui Po section of Hong Kong, China where Dr. Princess Brown and Sponge Bob are vacationing on Spike’s dime. We eventually discuss selling positive pregnancy test urine for fun and profit. After spending some additional time discussing “What’s Twending”, we spend the last few seconds of the show interviewing our X-Steamed Guest, Jeff Klein (who strolled into the studio minutes AFTER the show started).

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SOTM-208 – A Well Endowed Sponsor

David Henderson – Bicycle Stud

This week we are joined by an “ex-steamed” guest, the lovely and talented “Star Goddess” Janet Sciales. The first few minutes are consumed by our reactions to the lovely gifts presented to us by Bill Schmotz… called variously… monkey ear, kidney bone, jack-a-landon, and dog turd. Our first topic called “The Vein of Yoof” concerns a clintic where they will pump new plasma into old bodies for $8000. This is followed by a phone call from one of our sponsor/listeners, Mr. Gameday Metric himself, David “Chuck” Henderson. He stays with us long enough to have his stars read by Janet who reveals that Chuck has a considerable “tail on his comet.” Janet, unfortunately for some others, continues to reveal the length of each tail in the cast, along with their prospects for the new year. A new wing is being added to the Smithsonian just to house this episode.

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SOTM-207 – Alternative Facts Show

Chief Police Superintendent Principal of the Police Superintendent Association – Gavin

Fortunately this show features the lovely and talented Miss Billie (offspring of P-Dub) and the lovely and talented Dr. Princess Brown (offspring of Spike) because having Meatball Mark and Sponge Bob in the chatroom was not enough to save the show. The first topic was about the man pictured on the left wanting criminals to be sentenced to wear some kind of windjammer. If that didn’t make sense this was followed by a story about a 78 year old man who was arrested because he was rejected by a woman. Of course none of that was factual either, so we wrapped up the hour with a game of “Jack… or Jack-a-Bob”. However, at the very end, we were able to “overcome” all the inherent incoherence with an appropriate tribute to a real person.

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SOTM-194 – Ketchup

Here is show #194. We know it’s an older show, but apparently it never made it into our podcast feed on iTunes. Never too late to ketchup though. (See what I did there?).

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SOTM-206 – The Show That Almost Wasn’t

img_3261This week’s show features 2 special guests, the lovely and talented Billie, and the lovely and talented Kim. But preparations for the show began with finding out 90 minutes before air time that our palluscious studios were not available and we had no place to do the show. With one hour to go we decided to set up to do the show in the bowling alley lounge, something we were not ready to try with 7 microphones and no hardwire network hook-up. But with 3 minutes to spare we got all set up and ready to go. As crazy as it was, it turned into one of our funniest shows of 2016. Who knew we’d save the best till last. Next show will be live on January 9th at 7PM Eastern.

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SOTM-205 – Sausage Party Picasso

portrait_de_picasso_1908We clearly need more women guests. A show of just the lovely and talented regular males seems to get off the track too easily. Once again Spike tries to explain why we are the Picasso of radio but we are struck by his resemblance to Hitler. We are side tracked so often it takes twenty minutes to actually START the first topic which as something to do with turnstiles that “admit one person at a time like Didney Whirl“. This twists into a discussion about Spike’s great aunt loving Piggly Wiggly, and Steve bagging groceries. At the 30 minute mark we begin a second topic which has something to do with Princess Brown not allowing football players to chew tobacco at work. We are left with just enough time to talk about “What’s Twending“. When Spike says in the promo that this is the most confusing show on radio, this must be the show he was talking about.

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SOTM-204 – Taller Driven Radio

Spike On The Mic Staff Dormitory

Spike On The Mic Staff Dormitory

This week the lovely and talented regular staff members are joined in the “shipping container” by the lovely and talented Janet (a.k.a Janice) Sciales, also known as Tampa’s own “Star Goddess”. For people who “haven’t heard us for the first time” Spike gives out the actual phone number to not call live on the air. We start off pole dancing in the now better smelling town of Jacksonville. From there we move on to deciding if we “approve of H.B.C.U. Spellman’s staculty admitting tranzenders“. From there we visit the segment with the best music, Clark’s “What’s Twendin?” Then there is a brief detour into Spike’s “Jack or Jack-A-Bob” game. Finally we end our journey with Janet’s Astrological Predictions.

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SOTM-203 – Gravy Stains

gravystainsOur lovely and talented regular male members begin the show discussing wether Steve should divert attention away from being covered in gravy stains by storming out of the studio. Despite our urging him to storm out, he remains for the entire show, which incidentally is now called “an award deserving Picasso“. Spike’s first topic is about 3 men with constantly changing names who are suing Chipotle because their “Bereavo” made them too full. We move from there to Bloomington, Indiana where they are changing the names of holidays because of “popular political correctness”. Our final topic is about a man named “Okassa Lou” who accidentally gropes a woman while driving a train in Tokyo. Only the train turns out to be a bus, Okassa Lou turns out to be just a passenger, and he was actually picking pockets. This show has been selected to entertain the prisoners at Guantanamo.

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SOTM-202 – The November Surprise

Bill Schmotz after stunning upset.

Bill Schmotz after stunning upset.

Nobody expected this to happen. The pundits all claimed this couldn’t happen. On this special post-election edition of the Spike On The Mic Show our lovely and talented regular cast members were joined by the more lovely and talented special guests Cindy and Lynn with no “e”. Even they were completely blindsided by this turn of events. No one could have predicted it. The lovely and talented P-Dub is so dismayed by this turn of events he is unable to do his routine job correctly, like simply turning on people’s microphones when they are introduced. Only one cast member seems to be comfortable with the results… the lowly and un-talented Bill Schmotz. If we ever actually win that award we deserve, it will be for surviving this week’s November Surprise.

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